My Body is Falling Apart

I'm quite sure that part of this is the whole age factor and I'd really love to put most of the blame into that category but I know deep down within my soul that it is not correct.  

Sure, I'm not getting younger but the fact remains that I have almost never been in good physical shape and thus while trying to get into better shape I need to learn to limit what I am doing until I build up to the proper tolerances and whatnot.  I over do things and push myself harder than I should and as a result I get aches and pains that are above normal or ordinary.

Case in point, with the whole moving adventure that happened recently.  I wanted to make sure that it all got done as quickly as possible so that I didn't have to drag it out.  There were points where I didn't have the help that I required and so I did what any self respecting man would do and said "fuck it, I can do this myself."

Problem is that I really couldn't and needed to wait for help.  There was one piece of furniture in particular that had moving parts and based on the way I was holding it and the way that it slammed down upon my wrist and sent a horrendous pain through my arm I honestly thought I broke it.  However it was just a bruise/sprain/something painful without the bone fragmenting.  I could barely use it for 3-4 days and even after that it hurt to put pressure on it.

On top of that there were things I moved by myself where I ended up having to rest most of the weight on my shoulder and of course I chose my bad one.  So that brought me back to feeling almost like I did when I tore my Rotator Cuff a few years back.  

The end result of all of that was not being able to do my exercises, specifically push-ups, for about 2 weeks. Now I'm trying to get back into the routine and it's basically like starting all over again, only slightly stronger.

The last few days I have done a minor amount of push-ups but have forgotten to document them on my little tab up there but hopefully that will change in the near future.  Today I was able to rattle off 15 of them and felt good about that but we will see how I feel tomorrow.

I also did a plank for the first time today and lasted a whole 30 seconds. WOOOO, I suck.

Whatever.  I'm trying and not giving up after a period of inactivity like I would have previously.

However, Now I'm going to put some food in my belly and then watch more of The Walking Dead Season 2.  I might throw in a little exercise between episodes.

grrouch out

Twas the night before Monday

The good news is that this morning I was actually able to sleep in.  After a nice long rest I Jumped on the scale and took note to the fact that I am rapidly approaching 255 which will put me at 45 lost pounds.
That's great considering I hung around 265 for about 2 months but now appear to be back on track and consistently dropping some pounds again.  By this time next week I will be under 255 and working on hitting 250.  I'm currently over half way to my goal of getting down to 220 but I'm pretty certain the closer it gets the harder it will be as I haven't been that low since College.


Early in the week I had made a concerted effort to actually drink more water after noticing the first set of results for what fluids I've been putting into myself.
Now that it's Sunday lets see if that effort was wasted or if it made any type of difference.

375.6 oz Diet Mt Dew
371.8 oz Water
32 oz Monster Rehab
16 oz Orange Rock Star
16 oz Fruit Punch Rock Star
12 oz Sugar Free Red Bull
16 oz Lambrusca delicious mess you up Red Wine


Running Totals
Diet Dew: 675.6 oz
Water: 591.5 oz
Gatorade: 64 oz
Orange Rockstar: 48 oz
Miller Lite: 36 oz
Monster Rehab: 32 oz
Bud Lite: 24 oz
Diet Pepsi: 16 oz
Diet Coke: 16 oz
Fruit Punch Rockstar: 16 oz
White Rockstar: 16 oz
Red Wine: 16 oz
Sugar Free Red Bull: 12 oz

At this point I have drank over 5 gallons of Diet Mt Dew this month and 4.5 gallons of Water for the month.
I drank a lot more water over the past week or whatever but I also increased my consumption of Diet Dew - Mainly to keeping late nights and needing caffeine to keep me going.
I'm quite curious if I can push 1500 ounces of Diet Dew for the month.

So, while my Diet Dew consumption is probably off the charts and highly unhealthy I'm still eating better and losing weight which is pretty much the only statistic that I honestly care about at this point.  Once I see the total numbers for the month then I can set some goals towards consumption for November and see if I have the will power to go through with it.

An Asshole Explains Beer to a Kid (link)

I stole to title but am re-directing you to the actual blog post.
I don't generally do this but sometimes you run into something so brilliant you want everyone in the whole fucking world to see it - and this is one of those times.

So go and read this, laugh out loud and keep reading this guys blog as there is much worthwhile in there.

Dead Beat Dads

It's not often that I stray into my own personal life on this little blog but I say screw it today.

Last night I'm spending time with my friend and her kid.  Watching some random junk on the TV and drawing different versions of Spider-man while enjoying some Pizza and Popcorn.  The kid is supposed to get picked up by the male parental unit at some point in the evening so that he can take him for the weekend.

After a little while the kid ventures into his own room to watch Spy Kids through Netflix while the adults sit in the living room watching Damages Season 3 and having random general discussions.  At about 7 pm the doorbell rings once.  After rounding up a barking dog the mother answers the door and nobody is standing there.  She then checks through the front windows and the old mans car is not parked out front.
It might have taken 1 minute to round up the dog and answer the door.  Whatever, maybe just some kids playing a prank.
A few minutes later the kid asks if anyone else showed up (he obviously heard the door bell) because he thought he heard someone else say hello.  We inform him that no one showed up and he goes back to watching his movie.

30 minutes later the doorbell rings again.  Back to the dog routine and answering the door.  This time the male parental unit is standing out there and asks for his kid to be rounded up for the weekend.
We pack up his normal book-bag with clothes and medicine and other kid essentials.  The kid goes outside with his male parent and then knocks on the door 30 seconds later.
The kid re-enters saying his "dad" sent him in to get his Wii.
So, I pack up the Wii into his bag along with a game and some of his characters.  This takes maybe 5 minutes at the most but probably less time than that.
Once again the kid is sent out the door to be with his male parental unit for the weekend.

About a minute later there is another knock on the door and it is, once again, the kid standing there looking dejected.
What's wrong?
My dad left without me.

What The Holy Fuck is wrong with people today?

1 minute later a phone call is made to the unit, no answer.
2nd call - no answer
Call from another phone - no answer.
The kid text messages his male unit "Why did you leave me?"
No response.
Leaves voice mail - no response.
Calls back a few times over the next few hours and no response.
One last call before bed "Dad, I'm outside looking for you, where are you?"

Fucking breaks my heart, seriously.

Why would you show up, then send the kid back into the house and leave with no word, just disappear?

I feel for the kid, shit like this hurts me.
I love my parents to death and everything they have ever done for me to get me to be the man (no laughing) I am today.
I do, however, understand what it's like to grow up and feel abandoned at an early age.  I had a dead beat female parental unit that I lived with which made my life suck more than I'd wish on my enemies.
And due to external issues beyond control I also, unfortunately, grew up for a few years with an absent father whom I never really got to see very often and when I did it wasn't for long enough.
I understand the longing of wanting to be with both your parents but being constantly let down.
I understand the emotional hell this kid must be going through just from everything I get to witness and shit like this gets to me and sticks with me.
I want to make the world right for him and let him know that not everyone is going to abandon him like this and that life might suck at times but it will get better.
I know I can't, I know there is nothing I can say or do that will convey that message to this child who is going through a shitty situation that is only being compounded by the shit that I described above, but I want to.

I also want to grab a hold of the male unit and slap some fucking sense into him, to give him a wake up call and show him how he is mentally fucking up and scaring his child by doing the shit he is doing but I suspect that he really doesn't care much about that.

Relationships are hard and most of them don't work.  This is to no fault of the children but they are stuck in the middle of it every single time.  However, being a parent is something that is (mostly) controllable.  If you don't want to be a parent then that's perfectly fine.  Make it known and move on.  There is no reason to drag children through the mud and make them endure the pain that is being caused to them by being a part time parent who only shows up or calls when it's convenient to you.

I don't expect responses to this really since it's so far left of my normal - I just needed a venue to vent a little bit because this is a lot more helpful than me calling/texting the male unit or making a trip to his work establishment this morning to give him a piece of my mind.

grr

Happy Hump Day

Welcome to the middle of the week where you have strangely volunteered to work an over night at your new store on only the second week of your existence there.

Last night I finished Season 1 of Damages and started Season 2 while visiting a friend.  Stayed up late in an attempt to sleep in because I know tonight is going to be bloody long and mostly boring.  There is actually still a chance that the reset crew could call our store and cancel - which is what they did to the store they were supposed to do last week.
However, no need to fear because no matter what we are working this overnight.  You see, there is company in town which means there are always things to do.  I also have 13 million things that I need to count each and every week now that I've got my new position.

Right now I'm training a guy to take my job.  I figure that in a year I'll have him promoted and in the same position.  However, my ultimate hope is that by that time I'm able to actually switch areas that I'm over so that he can just take over my area.  I would not be looking forward to the day where I would have to do all this work alone - but maybe that's just because I'm new and don't know the product that well yet.  Maybe in a year when I get him into bigger and better things handling my current workload won't be so overwhelming.
Whatever, that is for down the line.

This morning I woke up before 7 am again which really sucked but then again I had to pee so I took the opportunity to relieve myself in a toilet instead of on my bed.
Afterwards I did a quick check of the weight.
I mainly did this because yesterday I weighed myself before going to work and I was at exactly 260 - which meant that another day of controlled healthy eating would put me below for the first time in about 4 years.
So, with much happiness I report that I was at 259.2 first thing this morning.  All my hard work paying off as I have now officially lost over 40 pounds this year.
I'd still like to be able to drop another 20 before the year is over and I have 3 months to do it.  It's perfectly reasonable that I could do it but I'd have to make some changes to the way I eat in order to accomplish it and I realize that.  Only time will tell what happens but seeing that scale dip below 260 was an amazing feeling after being stuck between 260-270 for the last two months and slowly, slowly, slowly losing (and then gaining and losing and gaining....).  So, maybe this is what I need to renew my vigor and make another change to get me down to 250....  250 I don't think I have seen since 2004, and that was a pretty temporary drop at the time!

The other day I cancelled another reoccurring bill that will save me about $18 per month.  I'm really starting to get a handle on my finances now that I'm back in the house and just in time I guess since Xmas is right around the corner.  I still haven't bothered to work up my budget and it is really 100% laziness that has gotten me into this issue.  It's an easy thing to do and I just have to spend an evening doing it.  My problem is that I keep finding other things that I'd rather do, like watch 5 hours of Dexter instead.
Whatever.  I will have a budget written up by the end of the month that I will be able to follow for November and December.  I will have Xmas written into it and I will stick to it.  2013 is the year that I will do a budget and stick to it for the entire year.  There are things coming up next year that have been talked about and I am not going to be the reason they don't happen.

There are two possible mini-vacations to California which I do not want to miss.  There is a Trip to Pennsylvania that I am going to make happen.  I cannot make either of these happen at the last minute without some foreskin...er....foresight, forethought (those are both better than the 1st - oh the places my fingers take me).

Life is looking up, life is looking good.  There is a happiness within me that I haven't experienced for quite a while and I can't wait to see where it takes me.

grrouch out

A Surge of Visitors

Between 9pm last night and 3am this morning, Pacific Time, my blog received either a huge surge of random visitors or something went wonky with the blogger software.

My page views were approx 3 times higher than my previous largest views in a day which I find odd.

So, I thought I'd see if anyone else out there experienced the same phenom as I did, or if a bunch of strangers all truly just stumbled upon my little corner of the internets.

Mountain Dew oh how I love Yew

So, going through my collection of tabs and bottle tops to calculate how much liquid I have been drinking - I do believe that this is a pretty accurate and up-to-date list.  I might have missed a drink here or there but in the grand scheme one or two drinks is not going to throw this all out of balance.

Running Totals
Diet Dew: 300 Oz
Water: 219.7 Oz
Gatorade: 64 Oz
Miller Lite: 36 Oz
Orange Rockstar: 32 Oz
Bud Lite: 24 Oz
Diet Pepsi: 16 Oz
Diet Coke: 16 Oz
White Rockstar: 16 Oz


I have read 3 chapters of a book while at work.  This does not put me on pace to actually reach my goal of reading 2 books by the time the month is over but at the same time it's a start.  Most of my free time has been busy staying out of the house or watching TV seasons.  All I need is a couple evenings per month to read instead of going out or watching shows and getting back on pace will be easy.

Exercise has been nil since the move.  I haven't started sit-ups and I have no excuse other than laziness, but push-ups is just an aging body.  After the move my shoulder bothered me for over a week - the same shoulder where I tore my rotator cuff about 5 years back.  Today I feel like I have a sprained wrist.  I'm getting old and breaking down.

I've played a minimal amount of Video Games but think that I'm over an hour so far for the month.  That number will increase as I have a Strat Game today and need to get that in.

Now, my newly ordered NFL Package is awaiting me.

The Secret to life is .... Jeff Temple?

So, it's purely a case of "ask and you shall receive."

After months of stagnation I finally started to get a few more followers and we finally have someone who happens to fall on a lucky number.

As everyone knows the Secret to Life is 42 - this is a universal fact that cannot be argued.
However, what nobody knew, except one man, was that the secret to life actually had a name and this secret goes by Jeff Temple.

Welcome to the Cult of grrouch Jeff - Have a beer or two and thanks for being a follower!


Other than that, today has been spent with an episode or so of Damages Season 1 which I have gotten a friend into and now streams on Netflix.  While at home I am working through more of Dexter Season 3 and things are getting pretty friendly.

Life is good - party on

Weight Loss - Decisions Decisions Decisions

Yeah, Imma day early.  Whatever.
I suppose there is no real point in keeping track of how many days I have been doing this so I've decided to cut that junk out for now.  However the last few days I have made a discovery...

You see, I had my fat person pants and then I had some pants and shorts that I was wearing a size ago.  Everything beyond that has been tossed as far as I know.  So, the fat person size has been too big on me for a while now.  Lately they have become way too big on me.  It takes me contorting my legs and body into special ways just to get my pants to stay up long enough to tuck my shirt in and tighten my belt.  This is always a nice big win for the guy trying to be less fat.

Two days ago I was wearing a pair of shorts that were the size down.  I came home and undid my belt and they just slid right off.  THIS is a huge fucking smile.  Now I realize it was after a day of wear and they had time to adjust and stretch a bit over the course of the day but they still slid right fucking off and down to my ankles leaving me standing there like a horny guy on prom night at the first sign that his girl was now willing to play tonsil hokey with his tally whacker!  So, while I'm not quite down another size, I'm in-between sizes, I do know that it's coming soon.... very soon.

So, that leads to my decision.  When losing weight, when do you start buying smaller clothes.  I made the jump right away with some T-shirts that I buy off of Teefury.com, but with pants being much more expensive I'm pretty sure I'm going heading down the TBC route here and continuing to wear pants that are close to 2 sizes too big.  Just notch the belt and deal with it.  I'm a cheap ass - so I hate the idea of buying pants at one size and then actually spending money on them again later in the year.  Pants are not a casual buy for me, they are an investment.  I have pants in my closet from 4 years back probably.  Maybe 5 years.  Some of them are the next size that I'll be wearing but at the same time I'm not particularly fond of the style any more for various reasons and as such I just want to toss them (Actually, I'll donate them, but no use arguing semantics).

I've also been thinking about working in a more dress style pant and this would be a great excuse to buy a few of those, but once again I struggle with the spending of the money.  I could buy Video Games or Blue Rays with that money.  I could buy a night out on the town or a rub and tug ;-p with that money.  I'm sure that within the next month or so I'll make the right decision (and request a pair or two for Xmas) so really I'm just arguing with myself over nothing anyway.  But, it's what I do.

Today I jumped on the scale and am approaching 260.  My ongoing struggle, for the last few weeks, has emerged from the plateau and I've started to see a nice slow decline again.

In other news Yakshi is my number 41 - I can't wait to see who gets the honor of being 42.
Yakshi has been following me for longer than I have been following him as he runs the blog Not Necessarily Something which I have linked to previously and think is very worthwhile to follow.
Also, when I see his name I keep thinking of a mis-mash between Rikishi (former WWE Wrestler) and the Yakuza (Japanese Crime Lords).  Weird.  However, do note that this man Fucks Stephen King (and that right there is a reason to go read his blog RIGHT THIS INSTANT).

I belong to a site called raptr which tracks time spent playing video games.  Pretty much it's only use is to track how much time you have spent playing on Xbox Live because the functionality does not exist to track PS3 games played, and this is why I basically stopped using it.
However, I got an email (must be something new they are doing to remind people like me that they site still exists) stating that I played over 13 hours of Gears of War 3 the previous week when my buddy was in town and visiting.  I knew we played a lot but didn't realize that I had put in that much time.  So, praise be to grrouch for the gaming time.

Tomorrow I'm thinking of writing up a summary of my liquid consumption so that I can try to get on a weekly tracking for that.  I'm also hoping to report that my scale dipped below 260 for the first time in probably 4 years...  This is something that I WANT to happen and am actually going to have to force myself to eat properly today so that I'm forcing it to happen just because I starved myself.  It's so close I can taste it, well that and the delicious cheese cake I have sitting in my fridge waiting for me to chow down on it :)

What are y'alls weekend plans?  Gaming? Reading? Poker?
I'm paying bills and watching some Dexter today, then I'm going to play with my new Direct TV and start setting it to record some shows that I want to catch up on.

Got some Blue Bloods on my new Duds

Today was originally planned to head out to the Ren fair for the evening sometime after work but it appears as though a sick kid might put the kabosh to that plan.  If that falls through then I'll be spending a mostly quiet evening in front of a TV watching the final disc of Blue Bloods Season 1 with a friend.

Overall I think the show is pretty good for a cop drama but there really hasn't been a whole lot to make it stand out above and beyond the others that I have seen.  It's more family centric than the rest which is what it uses to try and give it that personal touch but I'm not really watching it because I think it's bombastic - I'm watching it because she enjoys the show.

I'll be ordering the NFL Package either tonight or tomorrow and still deciding on which one to get.  I'm considering getting the MAX package because that will allow me to install the NFL Package App on my PS3's and use them on two more TV's to have more games going on at once.  I believe it also allows me to go mobile with it and watch on a phone, ipad, laptop, whatever else.  But, I still have a few more hours to make that decision.  Luckily I have off this weekend and will be able to spend time watching the games and am quite stoked about that.
I'm hoping to invite a few people over for beer, wings and football.  A nice relaxing day watching overpaid grown men play a game for my entertainment!

Work started out slow and picked up real quick in a hurry.  I have one manager telling me some things that needs done and then another just dropped a huge amount of work into my lap.  So now the real fun begins.  It's been a while since I was actually held accountable for stuff like this and it feels good to be back.

And finally - I've hit the Big Four Oh!
It appears as though Chris Coleman has just recently has joined the Cult of grrouch and I want everyone to welcome him aboard.

(I think I got the right person - this one didn't appear at the top of the list, but at the top of the faceless list.  If I'm wrong - my bad).

I had my alarm set for 4:20 so that I had time to shower and relax a few moments in front of this keyboard to organize my thoughts.  Once again I woke up at 4:19.... WTF.
That one minute means a lot to me.  Let me just hear the alarm go off please.

What is everyone planning for their weekend?
I've got (possibly) the Ren Fair - Disc 2 of Season 3 of Dexter and Football on my board. Let me know what y'all doing.

The Cult of Personality

I want to take this time, at 4:30 in the morning, to recognize that I have gained a new follower of the Cult of grrouchie!
Everyone, welcome nailedontheriver to our little family and make him feel warm and welcome.

Today I finally get television added back into my life in the form of Direct TV.
I recall someone asking me why Direct TV over the others and it's simple - the NFL Package.  I have had Cox cable try and sell me on their "redzone" package where I can get updates and gobble de gook or whatever, but dammit I just want to watch the games and only Direct TV allows you to do that.
They also have the network that revived the show Damages and I really love that show.

For my internet services I have stuck with Cox Cable because that has been the only reliable cock in my life since moving to Vegas (don't type when you're tired, you'll make weird sexual jokes about yourself and people will be left to wonder).  I'm just not willing to switch to satellite or DSL because cable has been very good and reliable to me over the years.

Yesterday was my first day at the new job and everything went well other than this whole waking up before dog does shit.  I have never been able to adjust to having to be to work at 5:30 in the morning and I doubt it's going to happen anytime soon.  This week is all early and then next week I have two early, two late and one mid.  Well, that's what it says on paper anyways.  Next week I'll probably end up working one overnight  for a reset that is going on even though I know that does not sound nearly as appealing as I'd like it.
I volunteered to do the overnight to show that I'm a team player and because I wanted to hang out with friends that night which would be impossible when closing.  Whatever.

While not updating every single day, I have found a way to keep track of the liquids that go into my body that will probably let me sum up a few days to a week at a time.  Excitement huh?  Next I'll keep track of the liquid that comes out of my body for all of you.....
ok, maybe not on that last one.... eewwwwww

Now that Vacation is over I'm also back to salads during lunch, didn't realize I actually missed them while on vacation.

I've started reading another book - Bubba and the Dead Woman.
It's been on my "to read" list for a while now and my goal is to read a chapter per day while on lunch.  I think this will help me to get through my goal of 2 books in October.  I also happened to play about an hour of Video Games with the kid last night.  

Life is good - except waking up at 4 in the morning
grrouch out

Boob Tube Viewing Pleasures

What's a poor bastard to do?

Also, when in the hell did it get so expensive to watch TV? And on on earth are there 666 channels but most of them are dedicated to bullshit programming that I'm pretty sure 80%+ of the population won't watch.  However, to get that one channel that you do want to watch you have to choose a TV Package that includes 13 other channels that you will never turn on?  WTF?

I remember back in the day when we had just a handful of channels but we were pretty damned happy to watch what we had.  Hell, I remember having rabbit ears so that we could get more than 4 channels.  Picking up signals through the air just to watch NBC and ABC and liking it.

This new age of millions of programs of pure unadulterated garbage that I don't want to watch but have to pay for sucks. I am fully reminded why, when left to my own devices, I have not had any type of TV service for the past decade or so.  However, it's the other people who live here who enjoy watching.

So, as far as I see it I have 3 options.

I can go with Cox Cable.

I can go with Direct TV.

I can go with Dish Network.

Any other options that might exist have already been ruled out.

Also of note is that for various reasons I currently do not qualify for any special plans or discounts on any of these networks.

I have read bad and good on every single one of these and in the end, and I pretty much knew it, there is only one thing that matters which is why I ultimately sucked it up and went with Direct TV.

My wallet is going to feel a sting for a paycheck or two but in the end everything will work out and I'll be a better person because of it.

With all of that said, I am really looking forward to using the DVR feature on the system because there are a couple of shows going on right now that I really really really want to catch up on.

Breaking Bad Season 5 (Final Season).

The Walking Dead Season 3.

Doctor Who Season 7.

So, by the time I get home from work on Thursday it should all be set up and ready to go and I can begin filling up my DVR with a whole lot of goodness.

**This post was made over the course of about 4-5 hours while taking small breaks during cleaning and unpacking my shit.  I have The Mummy on the TV in my room and will be putting in The Mummy Returns as soon as it's over.  Back to your regularly scheduled day!

A Return to Normalcy

The last train to Clarksville has officially left and my life is about to return to the old normal routine that I am used to, and by that I mean my vacation is over and it's time to start earning a pay check again.

Ended up at Aliante watching the Monday Night Football game tonight and after 3 plays into the game there was an obnoxious Dallas fan sitting right in front of myself and my buddy.  We looked at each other and said "this guy's going to be an ass all night and I hope that his team gets whooped."

Prognostication 1, Obnoxious Dallas Fan 0

I know I won't do this daily but I wanted to at least start on the right foot.

I kept track of everything I drank over the course of the day and it was so varied that I thought I would touch upon it just a little bit.

By the end of the month I am hoping to have pie charts to share and dammit I wish blogger had the ability to do pie charts right within itself.  

My number 1 liquid of the day was Water which is good, however I do not expect that Water will be able to keep up with Diet Dew over the long haul.

Diet Dew and Bud Light were tied for second place today.

Third was also a tie between Diet Pepsi and Orange Rockstar.

So, One day in and I've consumed everything but coffee products.  Over all the "Soda's" are in second place.  I'm going to make a concerted effort to actually drink a lot of water this month to get into the habit of it and to actually try to be a bit healthier.  I do know, however, that I'm going to consume a lot of other beverages.  

Water: 50.7 ounces

Soda: 40 ounces (Diet Dew 24oz, Diet Pepsi 16oz)

Bud Light: 24 ounces

Orange Rockstar: 16 ounces

As for the other portions of my challenge I am officially changing #2 from "Beat 1 Video Game" to "Play 15 hours of Video Games."

I realize that it's pretty silly to have a goal to just beat one game when the fact is I could be enjoying multiple games, just not any of them to completion.  I came to this realization while playing games with one of my best friends this past week.  We put a good amount of time into Gears of War 3 (and beat it right before October) between campaign and Horde Mode.  I have a feeling I'll probably play a good amount of Horde this coming month and that would be counter intuitive towards a goal of "beating" a game.  Also, the other games I feel I'll probably play are going to be Borderlands 2 and Skyrim, both which you could easily put 50 hours into and probably not have beaten.  So - Instead I like my new revised goal because it's more realistic with where I am in life currently.

#3 - Read - I have not started yet.

#5 - Budget - While I have not sat down and done anything with my spreadsheet - I know exactly how much I have spent today, all in cash.

Sweet Dreams Children

Hope you all have had a great start to Rocktober!

Everything and Nothing

Well, I'd first like to start by welcoming myself back to the land of the internet.
I've had a lot going on over the course of the last week or so and I'm happy to report that pretty much all of it is good.
First things first and that is my vacation officially ends on Wednesday when I have to go back to work.  So, I've still got two more days to enjoy that.
I also officially turned in the keys to the apartment today and will get to write that chapter of my life off when I pay the water bill (tomorrow).
I also will be paying my last storage bill tomorrow as well (hopefully tomorrow) as I have emptied the thing out and never want to see it again.
Sticking on the topic of things I need to cancel: FreeCreditReport.com, WeightWatchers.com and.... I know there is a 3rd one but not sure what it is off hand. I'm going to have to look at my recurring bills from the past few months and finger that one out.

While everything I own is in the house, there is still a lot of cleaning and sorting that needs to be done.  Slowly but surely it is all getting done but it would be nice if the unpacking fairy would work her magic while I sleep tonight.

I weighed myself this morning and I was 261.2 which is pretty good.  I've eaten like a pig and drank like a fish this past week and am pretty surprised to have not gained back 8-10 pounds.
Places I have eaten over the past week that I can remember:
McDonalds, Jack-in-the-Box, Hash House A Go-Go, Buffalo Wild Wings, Billy Bob's Steak House, Pasta Palace and a few others.  None of these meals have been particularly small either.

As for the drinking - Good thing that I'm starting to keep track Oct 1st and not prior.  Went to BJ's booze shack (or something) and had 4 very tasty adult beverages.  Had another 4 at Buffalo Wild Wings.  Had 7 last night at Bills Gambling Hall (Blue Moons), had 2 tonight watching football at Aliante and then there have been others scattered in there as well.
Overall it's been quite an enjoyable vacation and I'm sad to see it go, but all good things must come to an end.  The fact that I still lost weight during this time span is impressive and I hope to dip below 260 by the end of this coming week.

Finally beat Gears of War 3 but that was 2 days ago and before October hit so it won't count towards my goals for Oct. However, with friends, I have been having quite a good time actually playing games again.
Starting in the morning I'll be focusing on my goals and making sure I achieve all of them.  I've already been thinking of new goals for upcoming months but I generally forget all about it 10 minutes later which means they were not particularly good goals.

After a very fun session at Bills Gambling Hall at the 50 cent One Dollar game I have decided where I want to take my bankroll challenge (which has thus far been abandoned).  However, first thing is that I need to save up the money.
Good thing I got that promotion in order to help me get to my "bankroll" quicker so that I can start it up.
I'm not sure If I'll bother to do it at all this year or if I'll start off 2013 fresh and attempting it.
What I do know is that I'm sleepy and about to hit the sack.

I drop my buddy off at the airport tomorrow and his plane leaves at 11 pm so on Tuesday I do plan on a bit of cleaning and organizing and hopefully a real blog post with some sort of substance.

Should I keep random running tally's on where I stand for my challenges or just let it be a total and utter surprise come the end of the month to see if I have done anything at all or if I've actually managed to do what I set out to do?

Goals for October

I'm Exhausted from moving all day and still have to do all the heavy stuff sometime tomorrow.
However, I can't fall asleep and as such I'm finishing this post up and posting it up early in most respects.


Whilst browsing through some of the random stats from my page, who visits it and how people get here I happened upon a blog that I've been enjoying the shit out of - Not Necessarily Something.

I think y'all should visit and read the randomness, there is a lot of fun and joy to be had over there.

However, the reason for the link love this evening is because I liked his post about Goals For September and I'm blatantly stealing it.

You see, I haven't really had a post like this for quite a while, in fact I don't really think I've set up monthly goals for myself since I stopped playing online poker so much (and Live poker to a degree as well).  So, it's a good idea to give yourself goals for a period of time and see where you are at the end of it.  And Thus, A new monthly series on grrouchie dot com is going to be my goals.

Goals for October

1 - Beat 1 Video Game - I have barely played any video games at all this year and I am a self proclaimed video game addict.  I don't know if I've just been in a funk or if maybe I'm getting over my addiction (if I could get over the addiction to stop buying the damned things that would be pretty impressive also) or if maybe my tastes are changing away from this entertainment medium, but I'd like to find out.   So, beating one game is not that hard of a challenge if I truly still do love to play them.  Can I regain the passion or am I doomed to a life of playing Skylanders with children?  

2 - Read 2 books - Reading is something I love to do in spurts and then I just randomly quit for years on end. I'll literally read like 15 books over the course of 3 months and then not read another single book for 4 years - I've done this a lot over the course of my life.  Last November when I got my Kindle Fire I started reading like a fiend.  Through February I read 14 books and then found a boring one that I just couldn't get into.  I haven't read, nor attempted to read, anything since then.  Gotta break this habit.  So, I'm either going to read Insomnia or The Wind Through the Keyhole by Stephen King - or both since my goal is to read 2 books.

3 - Push myself to be-able to do 100 push-ups and 100 sit-ups in a single day (not necessarily all at once, but over the course of an entire day).   An exercise goal is great to put in here because if I want to focus on it then I should set a goal of some sort instead of just saying "well, I'll do whatever I can do."  I'm slowly getting to the push-up goal but I haven't even started doing sit-ups yet so this will be very difficult I think.

4 - Calculate how many bad drinks I injest - I liked his #4 so I'm going to do similar, but first I have to get the calculations.  I know I drink A LOT of sugary beverages - like a fucking lot.  I'm pretty sure that if you ran tests on me part of my blood stream would be Diet Mt Dew.  I'm also positive that I have mini Dew cans living inside my liver and kidneys.  I also injest quite a few energy drinks over the course of a month when I'm running on E or when I have to be to work at or before 6 am and I didn't fall asleep until late.  I drink very little Starbucks so I'm expecting that number to be very reasonalbe, but I still have a few and I'd like to see just how many. Then there is Beer - my love, my joy.  I don't drink often, but I like to drink a lot when I do.
So, in october I'm going to keep track, on my phone, the number of non-water beverages that I am consuming and get back to you on what that number means to me!

5 - Budget, Budget Budget - I've gotten away from something that I instinctively should be doing all the time. I have a degree in fucking accounting for crying out loud. I preach to the masses that they need to budget and keep good records and here I am being a lazy bastard for most of this year and not having a budget and not having good financial records or anything.  So, I'm going to create a budget and I'm going to track my spending and I'm going to come up with some sort of plan after the fact.   Yes - this WILL happen probably.

I'll stop this list at 5 because 5 is a very reasonable number.
The only other thing I'd like to do is get on some sort of posting schedule which really works well for some of the others.  You know - Football picks on Weds, jerk off stories on Thursday, Poker on Friday, Weight loss on Sunday, etc...  I'm not going to list this as a goal though - it's just something I hope I put some thought into and if I don't then who cares right?  I mean, I'm cool with being random and all over the charts.

A very touching Video

Not that kind of touching.

I saw this video months ago - maybe 6 months back - but it keeps coming back to me.
I think about it probably at least once a week.

This little girl is amazing.

The reason I think about this video and this girl so much is because I think I have a minor form of the same disease.
I, however, only pull out spots of facial hair until the area is completely bald and then I am forced to shave more consistently until the hair grows back.
Been doing it since High School and some people probably think it's a good thing because if not for this then I'd probably look like a mountain man!!

Whatever.  Watch the video!
Also, I love the Song!

Weight Loss - Day 106

Yeah, This week is busy and as such I didn't get around to updating this.
I also have another post that was composed and supposed to be published but I never got around to that either and it'll probably hit the trash bin because it's a couple of days past relevant unless I change some wording.

Before I start my all day excursion to Move my shit from one crappy apartment to the house I figure'd I should give the Weight Loss Update.

Got on the scale today and was at 263.X - it was 20 minutes ago and I cant remember the X.  It was either a 3 or an 8 (or any other number really) but the fact is that last Sunday I was at 265 even and now I'm slightly less - this is two weeks in a row of progress so it looks like I'm back on the train to skinny town.

grrouch out

I'm on a Staycation BizNatchez

The day it came
the blood was rain
we harvested eternal pain
the Battle raged for a million years
but through the burning corpses pall
it was revealed that GWAR did fall
and we were banished to this Stinking Oddball Planet!

I'm on Vacation - it officially started last evening after a couple of naps to recover from the headache that I had.  At one point I got woken up by my HR texting me telling me that all of my info was submitted and that I was going to be very HAPPY with the offer the other store was going to make me.
I fell back asleep.

My phone rang, it was the other store.  I answered and had a brief conversation where upon I found myself trying to fall back asleep while on the phone.  Not good.  She gave me my offer.
I instantly woke the fuck up.  I was silent but I was accutely aware of everything going on in the universe at the same time.  My Spider senses were on overload - I couldn't speak.  She asked me what I thought and then I realized that I was still on the phone.
My words spoke elatement though I cannot repeat whatever it is that I actually said to her.  I was floored, it was a great offer and based on our last conversation it was much more than I was expecting.
My life is looking up and headed in the right direction.

But back to Vacation - I ended up going out last night against my better judgement, it ended up worth it.  I drank an entire football filled with slush and rum and got pretty drunk without realizing it.  The whole time I was drinking and walking and talking and stalking and balking and (and enough - stop that shit right there) I guess the heat and the sweat didn't allow me to realize how much alcohol I had drank. I felt fine and kept thinking "This must have been weaker than I thought."
It all hit me later - it was a lot of booze and I was smashed.
I think I was mostly fine until I stopped moving so much.  I got home and took Monster out to water the flowers and that's about the point where I stopped walking straight lines properly.  At one point I remember trying to get up to go to the bathroom but my room had actually increased the amount of gravitational pull on the floor and I struggled.  My toilet was swaying back and forth causing issues with urination and I'm pretty certain that I didn't find that joke to be too funny at the time.  No toilet should move like that just to mess with a drunk man.

Now I have to go shit, shower and shave before heading out.... well... shit and shower.  I have a very firm rule that I do NOT fucking shave when I'm on vacation.  Sometimes, maybe, just a bit around the neck if it's getting a bit itchy and annoying.

Speaking of shaving - I'm at work the other day and in the break room and somehow a conversation about shaving privates comes up.  There are words said and jokes made and then someone makes a references to me.
I look at him and say something similar to this:
"Are you serious?  Do I look like the kind of guy that shaves his junk?  Look at me.  I can't even manage to take care of the hair on my face reasonably well and you're going to tell me that I'll take care of the hair down there?  You must be ochafucking mind"
And I ended my portion of the conversation there, much like I'm going to do here!

I've been blown (away)

Johnny, Angry Johnny.....
At least that's what is running through my head currently.

Yesterday, somewhere around noon, I had pretty much made up my mind as to what I was going to do.  I didn't want to tip my hat one way or the other but my mind was leaning pretty heavily in one direction (and lets just admit it, when a fan man leans over there isn't much that will change his direction).

So, most of my writing and thought processes were weighing positives and negatives just to see if there was anything out there that could change my mind.  Around 5:30 I received a call from my current Store Manager who pretty much confirmed everything I was thinking  during our conversation.

So, now that everything is finalized . dot . dot . dot...

I cancelled my 2nd interview and decided to go with my first job offer even before they called me to give me the financial information.
I decided to take the road less traveled, break my comfort zone and take the position with More Departments, More responsibility - the one that is going to challenge me more.

Looking back on things I perform better when I'm being challenged.  I become complacent when I am in a position that is no longer a challenge and I think this is a big reason why I have worked in so many different departments and held so many positions.  My last position was by far the most challenging one I have been a part of in my time with the company and I think I have excelled further with this position than anywhere else (including previous management positions).  I've been in there for almost two years though and I know it was time for a change.

Over the course of my 2 years in that position I have developed a lot of trust from pretty much the entire store and especially the Management Team.  My Store Manager and my HR (whom I have only known for the past few months) have both challenged me and pushed me at work recently and I feel I have performed quite well which is why they both pushed me in this current direction.  This will help me tremendously when I am ready to take the next step to salaried manager as my background will then include pretty much the entire selling floor plus some non selling areas.  In all actuality I will be more well rounded that most anyone else in the store other than the Store Manager!

I owe a tremendous amount of debt to my current Store and Human Resource Managers for helping me to get where I am.  I am looking forward to starting my new position.

So, I will have a great vacation and afterwards I will be starting my new position at my new store where I will encounter a whole lot of new challenges.  There are some familiar faces going into this new store which will help make the transition easier but 90% of the store will be new to me, most of the management team will be new to me and most importantly the customer base will be new to me.

And, on a final note - as my HR text me - sometimes Patience does pay off.
About a year ago I was turned down for this exact position in my current store.  I was greatly disappointed but resolved to work harder, be noticed and have better results next time.
My hard work was rewarded with a temporary promotion (and pay raise) before being moved back to my current position (keeping my raise).  I dedicated myself to impressing those around me and showing what I actually bring to the table instead of just resting on my knowledge of the company and coasting by.
One year later I get the promotion with a big raise.  Pretty much everything in life is going my way and it's a damned awesome feeling!

this have been very not grrouchie and you all have my apologies.  I'm sure I'll find something in the very near future to complain about.
grrouch out

Tree Hundo and the winds of change

This is a big number here. 300. It’s a magical number, a mystical number. 300 is the amount that I had to see on the scale before I realized that I’m a bigger fat ass than I had realized. 300 is also the name of a really shitty movie, but that’s neither here nor there.

300 is the number that belongs to this post. I wasn’t going to bother to do a reflective post until probably hitting post number 500 but it was the significance in my life of 300 that I figured I should just do it now instead of later.

Maybe it’s also the fact that I really like to hear myself talk. Like to hear myself type? Like to hear my fingers beat off of the keyboard with that lustful rhythm that they have? Oh, I love me some me.

The reality is that I’ve had portions of this post written, deleted and then re-written a few times over the course of the past week as I knew that 300 was approaching - I was just going to make some long (or maybe short) winded post about how hitting 300 posts is a great accomplishment and how the next milestone is in a couple of months when I reach a full year of continuous blogging. However, over the course of the last week a lot of other stuff in my life has started to come together thus revealing the fact that it’s not just my 300th post but it’s really a whole lot more going on in my life around this particular “milestone.”

As most of you probably already know from myself or from Carmel the whole house situation has basically sorted itself out. Starting on Monday (probably Monday, maybe Sunday) I’ll be moving myself and my parents back into the house. This is mainly to give my parents a better sense of security as they approach the last quarter of their life or whatever the hell it might actually be. You never know if you’re going to live another 25 years, if you’re going to pass peacefully in your sleep or if you’ll have a freak bungee jumping experience where the cliff is 50 feet deep but the cord they gave you is 75 feet long. Life is full of surprises and as such you just have to go with the flow and live everyday to the fullest.

With that in mind I wanted to give my parents some peace of mind in these “golden” years of theirs. They never have to move again. Their rent is not going to increase (well, shit, I might start charging more just because I’m a greedy bastard). Some stability. I am a rock.

On top of that it looks like I’m going to begin the next portion of the year with a new job as well. Thursday I not only received a call for an interview for a management position at another store, but 30 minutes after that I received another call from a 2nd store offering me a position that I had applied for (though they said they won’t know the financials of it until Friday).

I’m not big on making decisions. I like to let life come at me and roll with everything. Had I received the offer before the interview phone call then there would be no issue. But now I’ve got things to think about, I’ve got decisions to make.
I have to choose between the easy path and the more challenging path.
I have to choose between comfort and the unknown.
One of these positions would be very easy for me because I’ve done it before and I’ve been in that department a whole lot. The other one is going to be more difficult because it’s More departments (but not more pay) and I don’t know them so I’d be forced to learn a whole new segment of the business that I’ve been apart of for the last 10 years.
One of them offers up an entirely new management team and the other offers up a manager I have worked with before and know what I can and cannot get away with.
Both are about the same distance from the house and give me approx 20 minutes travel time.
I’m over thinking everything, every aspect, every nuance. I know this but this is what I do.

To illustrate how much I hate to actually make decisions and the way I have dictated the way my life will work. When I was applying for college I sorted through the 13 million applications and recruitment letters that came to my house and narrowed everything down to maybe a handful of schools that I would be willing to attend. I then looked over the applications and chose to apply to the only school that did not make me write an essay as part of the application process.
Yes, I’m not making that shit up. I wanted to attend Pitt because of my love of all things Pittsburgh. The Steelers, the Pirates, the Penguins, everything. However, their application had either 1 or 2 essays that I’d have to write so I discarded it.
Instead, I applied to Penn State because there was no essay portion. After looking at the applications and the campuses I decide that I was going to Penn State - not that I was going to apply but that I was going. So, Penn State was the ONLY school I applied for and I never thought twice about it.
People in school thought I was stupid and asked me what my backup plan was. It was hard explaining to most of them that I didn’t need one, I was going to be accepted and there was no other way about it. In the end I was accepted and my life choices have led me to where I am and where I have been.
This is how I run my life. I make decisions and they just happen.
I totally forgot where I wanted to go with that, but much like everything else I’m not going to go back and re-read it and fix it up and whatever else. Those words stand on their own (or I hope so) and that’s that.

I know it doesn’t sound like a whole lot but for a guy who likes to take everything with a laid back attitude I’ve just got too much going on right now. I’ll be dying for a week of uninterrupted rest by the beginning of October.

Cleaning, Packing, Moving, Cleaning, Unpacking, Interviews, Deciding on a new job and a new store, Having two different sets of visitors in town to entertain amidst everything else.

Anyone want to give me a nice relaxing sensual massage with a happy ending to help take the edge off of my nerves?