A Year in the Making

The last year has been a pretty fucking wild whirlwind for me.  It's been full of ups and downs and a whole lot of uncertainty and doubt. It has been, without a doubt one of the strangest 12 month periods in my life and I went on this self-discovery journey and started to pick up the pieces that have been falling apart for a number of years and I just wasn't aware of it.

Oddly enough, one of the biggest influences in my life has been all of you people.  Yes, whoever happens to be reading this shit right here, I'm talking about you.  Even if I have no interaction with you in any other way or if I talk to you daily through phone, texting or even social media you all have helped me out in one way or another.  What started as another (to be) failed attempt at keeping a blog of some sort to detail certain aspects of my life for shits and giggles turned into the ultimate version of self help and self discovery.  I've gained quite a few friends and positive influences along the way and I'm happy to have you all in my life.

And by our I mean My - It's all Mine Dammit!

So, November 8 2011, one year ago to the date I erased the last 5-6 months worth of poker related content that was populating my blog and I began anew with a less focused blog and just some random desire to express myself.  I started with just a few random people who would read regularly and posted links in various places that I would frequent depending on the content of the days ramblings.  Over the course of the last year I have gained a small following and it still amazes me to this day that people come back regularly to read and even comment on the various crap that filters through my fingers - but whatever - you are the cool people of the world!

There is a party in my pants and you're all invited

I have never kept up anything quite like this for this length of time.  I generally lose interest after a few months but something changed this last time.  I rediscovered my love of writing and telling stories.  I suppose it was the change of focus from trying to be something that I wasn't completely comfortable with to actually partially finding my "voice" as it were.  You see, I had registered this blog sometime back in 2008, 2 years after moving to Vegas, with thoughts of detailing my poker experiences and seeing how I have changed and improved over the years.  At first I just regaled myself with poker stories from my past and different humorous situations that I got myself into when playing up at the Indian Casino's in New York when I was living in Erie PA.  I never marketed the blog and never told anyone about it and thus never received any hits, not even a couple of random ones.  Whatever, no big deal.

My next adventure started a couple of years later when I became a functioning member of the Vegas Poker Now forums and started occasionally blogging about poker again.  At that time they forums had a Wordpress blog set up that I used that linked directly to the site/forums.  I enjoyed it a bit and kept it up until the site finally was bought out by AllVegasPoker.com.  I saved my blogs and imported them here.  A little while after that I started writing again but deleted everything prior to it - probably a dumb move.  I'd love to go back and read anything random that I wrote from those time periods but that will never happen.

This was my pattern and I expected it to continue.  Write for a few months and then quit. Come back a year or two later and start all over by deleting the previous experiment and beginning anew.  Somewhere in there I got back to what I enjoyed doing and that was just entertaining.  Sure, I know that a good many of you specifically started coming because this was a rough "poker blog" and that was a big part of the group that I managed to weasel myself into. However y'all stayed when this became a (for lack of a better term) "life" blog and I just started talking about whatever the hell I wanted and stopped trying to focus on just one aspect of my life.  I thank you all for that.

Over 60,000 page views, over 3,000 comments and 42 registered followers (And also a few regular anon's who comment and give feed back - Chuck and Fboy the main two).  I also randomly got paid to make one of the blog posts (though I don't think I ever talked about that on here) which still blows my mind! It's all pretty surreal to me in all honesty.  Over the next year I hope to interact with you all a little more.  If you have a blog I'm going to attempt to visit regularly and leave comments and feedback as well because I know how much it means to me when someone takes the time to respond to let me know that they are following along.  Hopefully in another year I can look back and marvel on the fact that I've been doing this for 2 straight years as I really haven't grown tired of it in the least.

With all of that being said, this next year promises to be fucking amazing.  Everything that was wrong with the previous 12 months is no longer valid and my life has done a complete turn around.
I'm happy, I'm in love and I'm about to take a few steps towards some goals that I set for myself decades ago, yes - decades.
As of this writing I currently have set up a meeting with Vegas Linda Lou who has agreed to help me try and break into the comedy biz. She is one of two people who have volunteered to help me out and allow me to make an attempt at something that I've always wanted to try and yet still scares the piss out of me at the same time.  I don't mind the whole public speaking aspect - it's the potential failure that knots me up.
However, I have talked about it in the past and now is the time that I finally put the foot forward.  You cannot succeed at something that you do not even attempt.

So thank you all for being amazing and accepting me for who I am.  Thank you for checking out my little part of the world and making yourselves comfortable.  I hope to continue to provide some sort of entertainment for at least another year and really hope y'all stick around for it.

This was enough seriousness - hopefully my next post has more humor and probably some titties in it just to change the mood and keep people interested!!!

Most Important Day

The most important day of the year was not Yesterday - It is, in fact, Tomorrow.

Political Rambling

Yeah

Presidential elections are much like leap year. They come around once every 4 years and one day later no-one really gives a shit about them any more.

I don't vote, I don't care.  I registered once in my lifetime and that was when I was forced to do it upon turning the arbitrary age of 18. That was 18 years ago and in all honesty I don't remember how I registered all these years later - probably as an independent though.

You see, I've never followed Politics.  I remember being young, riding a school bus to - uh - school and talking about the presidential election and who everyone thought was going to win (and by think I mean just a bunch of kids repeating the ramblings or wisdom of their parents) and I remember knowing the name Ronald Regan.

After that I remember having an election that, to me boiled down to Bush or Cock and I told everyone that if I was voting it would be for Bush because what man is going to vote for Cock - and much to my prediction Michael lost that match up.

Also - and this sounds entirely random and made up - but every election that has happened since then I have made my predictions based on personal feelings and nothing to do with politics or national consensus or anything else and every single time I have been right, so far.

I knew Clinton was going to win because he was more of an every day American than Bush.  He was fat and liked to eat fast food but at the same time was into banging broads.  I knew bush Junior was going to win and even though I preached to the world that this country wasn't ready for a Black or a Woman to be in charge that whichever of the two made it through to the actual election would become president because, quite frankly, the other candidate was a pretty scary choice.  Especially after choosing Palin as a running mate.

So to continue, or to break for that matter, my streak I'm using this public media forum to make my bold prediction and let the Apocalypse happen as it may.

You see, I just don't think Romney can win this thing.  I think the guy has built his campaign around a million and one lies and has told them so much he believes them.  Every time I think he is going to say something that makes sense he beats around the bush and doesn't actually give any information.  His campaign is, from the little that I have observed, built 100% upon what Obama has NOT done in the past 4 years as president.

Here is my issue with that.  I think Obama has just finally gotten to the point where the last 4 years of Republican bullshit has been finally cleaned up and he has an opportunity to make a difference.  The economy crashed under the Republican watch but it just so happened that the Democrat took over while the ship was sinking and now all of the Republicans want to come out of the woodwork and talk about how the economy died with Obama in office while not admitting any blame for the mess that they helped to create and build before We The People got wise and kicked their asses out of the office.

Yeah, I guess you could say that in a two party electorial system I'm more Democrat than Republican but I think that's just because the last couple of decades the Republicans have given us shit to work with.  Al Gore? Bob Dole? The crazy fucker from the last election? And now Mitt Romney?

I wish that any independent actually stood a chance so that it could become a real 3 party race but the fact is that the 3rd party gets so little attention that they really don't matter and seemingly only exist to be made a mockery of.

So, tomorrow (I'm writing this on the 5th no matter what day you read it on) I am going to wake up way too early and head out to work and after that I'm going to pretend that nothing special is happening.  I'm going to go ahead with my day and enjoy it while trying to stay out of any political discussions.

Fact of the matter is that come November 7th nothing will have changed for me.  I'm no longer below the poverty line but I sure as shit am not too far above it.  I don't make enough income for the real politics to really affect me.  Maybe if I were really part of the Middle class I'd care a bit more because I know that deep down the Republicans want to eliminate it and create a bigger divide between upper and lower.  Whatever - that's for another time and place.

I've still got my bills to pay and I've still got my life to live.
To all of you who decide to vote - I hope your guy wins and that it makes a difference in your life.
To all of you who decide not to vote - that's your right as an American as well.

To all of those who haven't read my Facebook.....
My politician has a bigger dick than your politician!

grrouch out

Holy Shit I Gotta Pee

For those of you who have never had the fortune to listen to Pig Vomit at an earlier point in your life - I stole the title from one of their songs.

We've all been there before, sometimes you really have to go.  Enter the house and the bathroom is on the entire other side of the entrance so you start making the quick dash of shame where you are simultaneously undressing yourself and throwing your clothes everywhere just so they aren't in your way by the time you make it to the bathroom.

However, this is all acceptable because it's your own private residence and even if there are a few people around to witness it they are in your house and they can choose to look away.

So, right before playing a little bit of poker I decided to go see a man about a horse.
Walking into the bathroom there is an old man in front of me who either A) really has to piss or B) just doesn't give a fuck any more.
Two steps into the bathroom he is loosening his belt.  We've all seen that before.
However he doesn't stop there.  WELL before he ever gets to the urinal (and I'm talking 10 feet before minimum) he undoes his button and pulls down the zipper.

Like this but up close and in person - and way scarier!

His pants are below his ass with 5 steps still to go and I get to see old man ass crack.  Glad I don't have the front view because his pants are just as low there and I can only assume everyone else gets a good shot at some droopy old man balls.

The image is currently stained in my mind. Old pasty white ass crack.
I'm going to need some sort of cleansing or a night of heavy drinking to get this visual out.
I've been scarred. I need to cry.
Someone hold me?

And now another What The Fuck is Wrong with People moment.

Before (blue) Waffles comments - She left her panties on and almost pissed in what I'm presuming is her own shoe.  And someone thought it was a bright idea to fucking post this on Youtube?
Christ on Crutches people.

Triumphant Return to the Tables

New Years Revolution #1 for um, the rest of the year.... Play More Poker.

Remember back in the day where everyone talked about poker and everything was right with the world? And now almost all of the "poker" blogs that I've followed pretty much never talk about poker any more and instead we have morphed into this group therapy mentality where we bitch and moan about the chick at Wal-Mart who called us fat even though her chins are larger than our thighs but at the end of the day we all feel a little bit better about it because that's just how fucking therapy works right?

Where was I going with this?  Oh yeah - Poker Poker Poker.
Gimmie 3 steps, gimmie 3 steps mister.

I want to play more. I desire to play more.  This year has been pretty shit in the poker department.  I mean, I just recently found out that I lost my Platinum status at Harrah's/Caesars/Whatever because I haven't put in any frigging hours this year.  This is the 1st time in probably a 3-4 year span where I've lost that status.  How in the hell am I supposed to eat at their buffets now?  Stand in line? I don't fucking think so.

If  you'd like to go back - here were my thoughts as of a couple of months ago.  Actually that just links to everything with the label of "bankroll challenge"  which is what I'll be using with all of my subsequent posts on the subject.

I'm not actually following those guidelines currently but I do wish to work my way up to them.  Fact of the matter is that I really just want to play poker at this point because over the last couple of years I have not put in a whole lot of time or effort.  I want to get my feet wet again and just start to enjoy the game again.  Thus I have decided to play some really low stakes poker and just have fun.
I'm playing in the lowest game in the whole frigging city (with it still being No Limit) and I'm going to enjoy myself.  If I find myself not having fun I'm just going to leave.  My hobbies should bring enjoyment to my life right?

Last night I decided to grab a few bucks and head down to Bills Gambling Hall and Swap Meet and just play for an hour or so until something else came up.
I bought in for $20 and was off to the races.

Yes, I just said that I bought in for $20.  You will probably be hearing this a lot in the future until I steamroll the game and work up to real poker.  Whatever.

3rd hand of the evening I have KJ on a K high flop and no one bets.  Turn is another K and I put in over half of my stack and one caller.  River puts another pair on the board and I push, guy calls.  I split with K7.  Whatever.

A few hands later I get involved in a pot where come close to doubling up with something I don't remember. What I do remember is that Atlanta had just scored a touchdown and the next hand was going to be a splash pot and I was going to be on the button.

I straddle the button and the cards are dealt.
An extra $50 is added into the middle of the table for everyone to fight over - that's 2.5 buy-ins!  I have to compete for it dammit.
Small Blind Pushes all in.  Small Blind is drunk and loves to re-buy.  Small blind also has pocket Tens and I determine that I'll probably call if one or two others come along no matter what my holdings are.
There is a caller out there in middle position and then it comes to me.
I have AQ of spades and there is no way I can fold now.  So, my money goes in the pot as well.
I have a side pot with pocket tens guy.
Flop has a pretty ace and is rainbow.
Turn brings a 2nd heart to the game.
River brings a 3rd heart to the game.
Guy in middle position finally shows his hand.  J9 of hearts.  Says he only called because some other guy talked him into it.  Scoops a $100ish pot including the $50 already in there.
I scoop a $24ish side pot and am back to starting stacks.

The night went on and I lost another to a rivered flush but I kept taking chips from the drunk guy next to me (I moved seats to have position on him a few hands later though).  I noticed his betting patterns when no one else wanted to bet but he had at least bottom pair and thought he might be good.

One time I called him down on a board with 3 overs to my pocket 5's and he only had bottom pair.
Another time I called him with a pair of 9's on a 259JQ board and he had paired the 5's.

And even though he just re-bought for $80 I had received my phone call that alternative evening plans had arrived and left with my huge profit of $12.
Yes - that's over half a buy-in somewhere in the range of 1 hour played.

I don't care, I'll take it.

Current Sockroll: $212 -
I'm not going to tell you guys which sock I keep it in so don't think about fucking mugging me when you see me walking the cold, dark streets between Bills and Bally's on my way to or from my car.

I'm hoping to play once a week for a few hours and maybe get a post or two out of it for your entertainment.
I do have one more story to tell from this evening but it deserves it's own post.

Playing with Cox

Over my few years here in Vegas the one thing that has remained consistent is that I have Cox internet service.  I have never bothered to go through anyone else as I feel that even though the price might be a bit higher than elsewhere the internet service has been very consistent for me and I have had relatively few issues with it.  

So, when I moved back into the house I transferred my service from the apartment.  Recently I logged in to look at and pay my bill online but it was still only showing the information from the apartment still - there was no information as to my new service or address.

I fired up the live chat.

For those of you who have never used live chat before, you basically fill out a form and submit your "question/concern/whatever" and once a "live agent" is available they come on, mention that they are reviewing your information and start to try to provide solutions for you.

I did my end and the little box popped up telling me that I am connected to William or some shit like that.

After about 3-5 minutes William finally types "We have been connected for quite a while and you haven't said anything, do you wish to continue?"

My reply was "You haven't held up your end of the bargain - I submitted my question and thus far you haven't even said hello."

William: "Yes, I see here that you are inquiring about adding TV and Phone Service to your existing internet service"

grrouchie: "Your reading skills are pretty piss poor if that is what you got out of my paragraph.  What I said was I want to pay my bill but the information is NOT showing on my account online"

William: "Oh, sorry about that. Let me look into it"

grrouchie: "No, I'm afraid you'd probably fuck that up too.  I'll just call a live person from India so that I can't understand what they are trying to say but at least I know someone is there and maybe paying attention"

Then I called the support phone number and after talking to some random guy for about 10 minutes he tells me that he will be connecting my new account to the old account so that I can access the information.  I ask him how long it will take for this to happen and he said it would be available next time I logged in.

So, today I go to log in and notice that my information is still not there.  I decide to go the Live Support method again but everyone is busy fucking over other people.

So, not wanting to talk to anyone I decide to send an email instead of make a phone call.

I write up a detailed paragraph stating that when I log into my account my billing information is not there.

I would like my information to be there so that I can actually give them the money that I owe them.

I just received my email reply.

Below is a copy/paste of the exact information just changing information dealing with my account/passwords/etc....

COX

Dear grrouchie:

Thank you for your inquiry. Cox is committed to providing the best customer service possible.

A temporary password: WeAreRetarded was installed to your account. Please change the password to prevent unauthorized use by clicking on "My Connection - Manage My Account - Change Password".

To login, visit our website at: https://ww2.cox.com/ibill/home.cox and enter your login and the temporary password to access your account.

I hope that we have been able to provide you with the information you requested. If we can be of any additional service to you, please do not hesitate to contact Cox Communications again.

Thank you,

Michelle U.

Cox Communications

Las Vegas E-Care Team

October in the Rear View

On the weight loss front I'm still recovering from my buddy's reception.  As I talked about before the food was amazing and I really couldn't stop myself from forcing more and more into my mouth and swallowing.  I knew the results would sting a little bit but that it was only a one day minor set back in which I would lose again over the course of the next couple of weeks without an issue.

Of course, it takes some time to make up for a 4 pound gain out of nowhere but whatever.  Now that a week has passed I've lost about 2 of those pounds back and by the end of next week I expect to be back to where I was before.

Octobers Monthly Goals were a disaster and I'm going to blame this on my budding social life.

By social life I mean I've been spending my time with mostly one person outside of work instead of spending that time at the house and on the computer or playing Video Games.

I had a goal to beat one Video Game which I later changed to playing a certain amount of hours.  I am going to write this one off as a Win.

I put in a couple of hours of Skylanders. I put in a few hours of Borderlands 2 and I played 2 games of Strat-o-Matic football which takes a couple hours per game so I hit my goal but just the minimum.

Read 2 books - FAIL - bit fat fail with a side of "not even close."  I started reading a book on my lunch breaks at work and just really couldn't get into it and thus lost interest in reading in general.  I've got a bad habit of not being able to just switch to a different book.  I generally have to take some time off before switching because I still have the last, horrible, book in my mind.   Blah.

Exercise goal - Fail

Drink Goal - WINNER!   I didn't keep track all month because that got too tedious but whatever.  I realize that I put a lot of bad liquid in me and as such I'm going to make an effort to slowly change that.

Budget goal - Passed.  I put together a budget for November and will carry it forward to December as well. I need to make a few tweaks to it as my insurance at work is going to be going up a bit and I've begun contributing to a 401k plan again.  Plus I completely forgot to put anything in there about Xmas...  oopsie, how did that little holiday slip my mind.

Goals for November:

#1 - 10 hours of Video Games

#2 - Dexter Season 4

#3 - Drink More Water, Drink Less Dew

#4 - Weight Below 250

#5 - Read 1 book

#6 - Revise Novembers Budget and stick to it, Complete Decembers Budget

Now, one more small tidbit before I go find something else to do before work today.

Earlier in the year I had talked about finally trying to reach one of my life long goals of giving Stand Up Comedy a try.  I wanted to be able to do it by the end of this year but there were way too many life complications in the way for me to reasonably be able to do what I wanted.  However, all of my challenges have been eliminated and I've begun thinking about it again.

That being said - Over November and December (two extremely busy months in their own right especially if I take on a second job for the next two months) I'd like to start trying to write a few jokes and organize some thoughts and figure out how this whole process works.

So, that means I've got an email to send out to Linda Lou who so graciously volunteered to help me reach this goal and start getting some advice and direction.

Publicly - I hope you are still willing to have me and take me under your wings Linda!!! :)

Whore

Forgot how much I loved a good female screamer!

So, 100% by chance (and I'm glad it happened) the radio station played a song the other day that I really dug.  The first thing I did was Google what I thought were some of the lyrics to find out who the band was so I could check out some more of their music.

As it turns out I was slightly wrong on some of the lyrics that I thought I heard but at the same time I still got enough right that I got the info I was seeking.

Next move was to fire up my Amazon MP3 app so I could check out prices and whatnot.  The album that I was after was $5.99 and that's about $.99 more than I'm used to paying but I really enjoyed that one song so what the hell right?

So, the song I heard was the 2nd one that I'm putting up but the 1st one is the one I'm digging the most at the moment.

The album is not flawless but it's well worth the money that I paid for it.

I've been a bit absent lately with work and pleasure but my load should be lightening up a bit in the near future so that I can try to get back to some sort of semi-normal posting schedule

All over the place

Today is just going to be a little bit all over the place, or at least that's the plan.

First I want to point out the new shirt that I will be buying as soon as my little post here is done and over with.

Stained Ash Window

Oh how I really do Love this design and oh how this one website has decided to steal more of my money than any other lately.  Sometimes I wish that I never stumbled upon it and then I get that little kid during xmas excitement when I open my mailbox and I have a package from Teefury and I know it was all worth it.

Since I have dropped a good amount of weight some fun shirts were the way I decided to treat myself.  For the past 3 years I've pretty much wore the exact same outfit day after day after day.  Kahaki pants with a button down shirt and generally a wife beater underneath (I know some object to the term wife beater to describe a plane white T, but that is what it has always been to me since I was just a mixture of sperm and eggs.)  However now I'm accustomed to rotating between my collection of awesome new T-shirts under my button down shirt at work and then after work I wear something with personality.  In an odd way I feel more in touch with who I used to be/who I want to be.  Everyone needs to have fun and wearing a shit like this helps me feel a bit better about life.  I've got my professional work apparel on the outside but I've got my personality waiting to spring forth the moment I punch out for the day.

This weekend I went to a friends Wedding and Reception.  The wedding was on Saturday and the reception was Sunday.  It was strange having them on two different days but when the place you want to hold the reception is all booked up then I guess you make small sacrifices like that.
The wedding was held at Caesar's Palace.and was lovely.  Leaving work I thought I was going to run late because by the time I had put on my pants I realized a couple of things.   1 - They no longer would stay up by themselves.  2 - The belt that I wear for every day is not appropriate for a more formal dress outfit.  3 - I was going to have to stop somewhere and buy a new belt.
So, I made a quick stop at Walmart on the way to the wedding to complete my outfit.  I parked at Caesars Palace on the exact opposite side of the place that I needed to be.  For anyone who has casually walked through Caesars Palace you know that this place is about 18 miles long and getting from one end to the other is not something that will happen in a short time frame.  I hurried my fat ass along the way stopping to ask for directions once or thrice and finally I arrived to the chapel area 2 minutes before it was supposed to start.  Thankfully it didn't start for another half an hour and I had time to relax and view the chapel area.
I only knew a total of 4 people - Bride/Groom/Bridesmaid and one other innocent bystander much like myself.  I took a seat in the exact back of the chapel so that once everything was done I would be able to escape unharmed.

Day two was the reception and I seriously debated whether or not I should even attend.  Recognizing that the people at the wedding were going to be the same at the reception and understanding that I basically would only have one person to socialize with it was a constant debate during the whole thing.
However, I sought some sage advice from someone special and exactly like I thought she would she told me to show up and at least make an appearance because, after all, they invited me to it because they wanted me there.
So, after work I run home and change into my duds (I should have taken a pic so you all could see me snazzed up) and head out.  Abused the open bar for the 40 minutes it was available to me and chatted with a former co-worker whom I have not seen for about a year and a half to two years.
Now, one of the main reasons I came to write today was the food.
Oh, the sinfully delicious food that has set me back a week or two.
Maggianos of Las Vegas

Regular eating section

This fine little Italian place in the Fashion Show Mall is an exquisite place to eat.  This was my first trip here and I'm really glad that it was.  Being a wedding reception I had the chance to sample some dishes that normally might have taken several trips to be able to get to and the fact is that if you have eaten here once you damned well are going to want to come back again - the food is that good.

Formal eating area for receptions and other shin-digs

The appetizer course started out with two plates of salad on each table.  One was a blue cheese with bacon and the other one actually was probably the same but had tomato's and no bacon.  Everyone chose the one with bacon.  Then there was some calamari with sauce to dip it into.  The calamari was almost 100% great but I did run into one rubber band area and I was completely willing to overlook that as the rest of it was cooked well.  Last there was stuffed mushrooms which I did not touch but everyone else seemed to love them.

The dinner portion of the meal ruined me.  I cannot remember the last time I had eaten so much in my entire life.  Everything was great and I felt like I had to try every single tray that was brought to our table because I'd be doing an injustice to myself and the restaurant if I didn't at least sample the dish.
There was a pasta with meatballs where the pasta was good (not great) but the meatballs were Divine.  I at about 6 of the meatballs by the time they finally took the plates away from us.
Then there was the Lamb cooked slightly less than medium with an Orzo sauce.  Wow, this lamb was amazing.  Then there was the cubes of steak, cooked perfectly, warm and tender and juicy and causing me to salivate just thinking about it all again. Finally there was some sort of seafood concoction.  Shrimp and crabmeat wrapped up in something with what seemed like a delicate Alfredo sauce.  Not a big fan of things that exist in water I decided to try this anyway because everyone at the table said it was great and they did not lie.  I nearly at the entire piece that i put on my plate and if it wasn't for those last two meatballs I think i could have done it.
By the time I stuffed the last meatball in my mouth I was literally so stuffed that I had trouble swallowing.  My belly was fully, there was an out of service sign hanging in the back of my throat informing me that continuing to stuff food in there was probably a bad idea.
It's a good thing there was another round of open bar between dinner and desert because I needed time to let my body digest a bit.
Desert - oh sweet desert.  There were two of them, a Tiramisu and a Cheesecake.  The tiramisu didn't sit well with me as the coffee flavor was too dominant and I'm not a big fan to begin with.  The Cheesecake however was divine.  That's not a figure of speech, that's a literal use of the word. Divine.  When I put the fork into my mouth the heavens opened up and angels sang to me while I was eating.  These angels sang a song that helped create extra space in my stomach so that the entire piece of cheesecake could fit.
Afterwards, on the table sat two plates with extra cheesecake on it - everyone was too stuffed to continue eating it and until they were taken away I really felt that it was a sin to let them go to waste.  I wanted more but could not physically eat more.  It was painful to let it go to waste but it was the right choice.

I will be going back to Maggianos again on a date night or something as I want more people to experience the amazing food at this place.

And finally - because of the fact that I stuffed myself fuller than a Thanksgiving turkey about to be devoured by 30 hungry family members I experienced about a 2 week setback in my weight loss!  This is no joke. I gained nearly 4 pounds from everything I ingested and now I'm going to have to get back into my normal, healthier routine again starting tomorrow and start working those pounds off.
Was it worth it?  Hell Yeah!

I'll wind this down quickly because I'm approaching a Rob number of words here.
The rest of my week is going to be fun as well.
Tonight is a trip to Bonnie Screams for my final Haunted House trip of the season.
Tomorrow is Trick or Treating for the first time in over a decade.
Friday is open for interpretation still. I'm really looking forward to these next two nights and debating on making a quick costume of my own for tomorrow.
This is the part that really annoys me because last year as I was packing all my shit up to move I ran across my Halloween costume from 2007 (the last time I enjoyed an event) and threw it away because I didn't think I'd ever wear it again.  Now, here I sit really wishing I still had it because I'd love to break it back out for the evening.  So - here is a picture from that event and it was a bloody amount of fun.
I did not ask permission from the other two to post this but I don't think my brothers will have an issue with it.

We were the Champions!  On the left is Crazy J and on the right is Andy W, in the middle is the grrouch you all know and love.
I essentially dressed up as Mosh from the old WWF days, complete with skirt and all, but the skirt doesn't show well.  I wanted to dress up like Mic Foley (I had the long hair 2 hours before this pic to do it) but we couldn't find anything to make the outfit right - so I went with Mosh instead.
It wasn't until right before putting on make-up that someone decided to remind me "You know, Mosh never actually had hair. If you want to do this right you should probably shave your head."
Up until this point in my life I had never shaved my head before. In fact, during the past 15+ years I had always had long hair and during this Vacation my hair was starting to grow out again as it was about shoulder length again.  I should also note that the day before this picture I also had a very disgusting lumberjack of a beard.  So, from how I arrived in Philly PA to how I looked for this picture was an extreme make over.
Luckily the house where the party was someone had a pair of sheers and the hottest roadkill bunny I have ever seen shaved my head and thus you get grrouch mosh!

(Picture a time lapse here as I'm searching for 2 more photo's - one of the bunny and one of me arriving in Philly). I'll have to come back and edit them in later I guess.... bummer


To all my friends on the East Coast - Stay safe but not dry.  Life is better wet!

#BaldforBieber

So if'n y'all follow the internet it appears as though 4chan decided to play a little prank and "leak" out information that Justin Bieber has cancer.  Then what happened was a whole lot of sheep started shearing themselves and posting with the hashtag #baldforBieber.

So, I can't resist the opportunity to take advantage of this to spread my own cause.
I, grrouchie, am here by also going Bald for Beaver
That's right, you heard it here first.
Only one razor was broken in the process, however two camera's also broke and my Mirror no longer is reflective after I walked by it.  I'm not sure what any of that means but dammit, look at that dome.  I'm a sexy beast aren't I?
And all because Justin Beaver does NOT have cancer.  Maybe he'll see this and find out how much he has touched my life, come to Vegas to visit me and take me out on a coke and hooker bender with Charlie Sheen and make my life complete.
Afterwards I'll have him autograph my bald head and then we will immediately run to the nearest Tattoo shop so that I can have JB's autograph permanently across the back of my scalp.
Then, weekly, I will head to my nearest hair salon and have them shave my head Except keeping a hair outline of JB's autograph.

I will forever be awesome and admired by millions across the globe as the stupid fat-ass in Vegas.

Octoberfest

Just a quick - I love Samuel Adams Octoberfest!

Maybe more later - right now I'm too busy polishing off a few (more)

Spiderman 3 - Years later

I know that earlier this year I may have complained a little bit about rebooting series so close to when they actually came out.  Spiderman may or may not have been mentioned specifically.

After being forced to sit through most of Spiderman 3 again today I want to retract anything I may have said in the past and go with "Thank god this series got rebooted."
It's not that I don't love Sam Rami and what he did with the series.  I thought the 1st movie was well done and the 2nd was pretty badass as well.  Maybe I'll think differently when I go back and re-watch them both next year and maybe I won't.  What is important is that I came to talk about Spiderman 3 a bit.

I totally get why they decided to do a reboot instead of continue with anything involving that last trilogy and it's because Spiderman 3 was a steaming pile of pigeon excrement.  I don't know where Rami got off the track.  Maybe he started drinking heavily and had some bad delusions   Maybe he stopped drinking heavily and it ruined his MoJo.  I don't know what the problem is.  What I do know is that Spiderman 3 is fucking awful and painful to watch.  I think it's akin to going out to dinner and ordering your favorite meal.  It shows up and you are digging the scents and then you pull the cover off of your mashed potatoes.  Well, what is supposed to be your mashed potatoes, but instead it's a steaming pile of cow shit with garlic and parsley.

I own the Blue Ray of Spiderman 3 but only because it was given to me by a "friend."  Some friend.
In fact, it's the only one of the Spidey movies that I actually own.  Today was the first day that it has ever "graced" my Blue Ray player and will probably be the last time as well.  I watched the movie when it came out and remember bitching about that little prissy emo bastard and the shitty acting.  I also distinctly remember really hating the ending of it.
So, if I remember correctly (I shut it off long before it got to this point again) the ending went something like this.
"I'm the Green Goblins kid and I want to fucking Kill Peter Parker because that asshole killed my dad"
"Peter Parker isn't a bad guy, he's your friend"
"Oh shit, you are right, How about I go save his life instead and then we can live happily ever after while giving it to each other in the rears with reach around's"
"That's the spirit."

An evening with Ghosts, Ghouls, Zombies and other unpleasant things

I'm going to start out today's little ramble by stating that no matter what I end up typing below, I don't feel that my words will actually do justice the fun times I had last night and the company I kept.

Remember that old classic song with the line "Don't know what you got till it's gone?"
Pretty much how I felt yesterday when walking into the Fright Dome at Circus Circus.
I've never been a huge fan of the holidays but always liked Halloween because it gave you a chance to be creepy for a day and explore the dark side of life (Although now it's just an excuse to dress like a slut ho douche bag sperm burper and wear as little as possible, but that's another rant for another day) with zombies and ghouls and whatever.  As a kid I still remember the excitement when I got my Freddy Kruger outfit complete with the sweater, mask and glove.  I actually had that glove for a long time until it finally disappeared either during my college years or shortly after.  I remember dressing up during high-school and just walking the streets during Halloween just because.  So, as things go when you get older, I just kind of lost touch with that spirit.  Every year I see the advertisements for haunted houses and every year I say I'm going to go but never end up doing it for various reasons.

This year, there was no excuse. I had an invite to hit up the Fright Dome with 5 haunted houses and some other attractions (along with some rides as well).  This year they are featuring George A Romero's brilliance with Ward of the Dead (which was primo top shelf grade A creepy shit if I do say so myself).  Romero will actually be there tonight (which Is one of the reasons we went last night - I expect tonight to be incredibly packed and lines to be a lot longer).

One of the Haunted Houses was called "The Anniversary" and when you start nearing the end they give everyone some 3D glasses to wear and continue your journey.  The 3D was pretty awesome as they painted the walls and added in some creeps that could only been seen (or hidden) because of the 3D effects.  One particular hallway was full of red and blue dots and hidden underneath the surface was a couple of people dressed up in all black with the same dots on their outfit so they could blend in.  When you got close the dots looked like they were moving a bit and then BLAMMO screams and thrills and chills.  Truly the best hidden "jump at you" moment that I've experienced in any Haunted House.

First walking into the area the whole place was darkly lit with tons of fog everywhere.  Lots of black lighting to go with it.  I had the feeling of a young kid hitting up his first Haunted House, there was a definite sense of awe about me.  We walked over to the closest Haunted House and waited in line.  BS'ing about random stuff and listening the sound effects being pumped through the entire place and more importantly from the neighboring scare zones.  Upon entering the 1st Haunted House I lit up like a kid getting candy, I'm not 100% sure if I stopped smiling the entire time I was in the 1st house (and subsequently the rest of them as well) as I was just so excited and happy to be there and experiencing it.  I kept watching the others around me as things jumped out at them for the various scares and watching them back peddle, or scream or jump or run into the person in front of them trying to get away and I just smiled.  I must have looked like a complete crazy idiot smiling my entire way through what was supposed to be scary and creepy ( and I admit, there was a lot of creep involved.  I was highly impressed but some of the layouts and looks and the people working there).

This, unfortunately, did not happen to me but a man can dream

Fright Dome has been going on for 10 years now and I have been in town for 6 of them but haven't gone until now.  I've made some bad decisions and will have to correct this buy making sure I go every year from here on until the end of existence.
However, this year I still have 2 other places I'll be hitting up.

And

To the lovely lady who accompanied me on such a fun evening and humored every little thing I wanted to do: Thank you!  You are amazing and will be repaid in kindness.

Tittacular Tuesday

I just felt like it was time to get back to some of the random degeneracy that I've enjoyed in my past.
Tuesday is a very manly day.  You've survived the weekend and kicked Monday's ass and now you need to be rewarded.  Thus, during my ramble you'll get some good old grrouch love to go with my words of wisdom and kindness.

I pretty much love my life right now.  Everything has fallen into line and I'm mostly in this happy place that I really didn't know I could resign for more than a period of a few hours at a time.  It's a bit strange because I like being an old curmudgeon and all.  And shit (not a proper way to start a sentence I would probably get told by my old English profs) the holidays are right around the corner so this is 100% prime time for me to start to slip back into seasonal depression mode (I've suffered for years) but I feel like thus far I'm doing good on that end of it as well. So - Boobs!

Facebook could pretty much be the downfall of modern civilization.  It has turned into a huge time sink that I've been trying to avoid lately but only managing to avoid on a temporary basis.  Last night I got home at about 11pm and after a quick phone call and a few conversations online with people I realized it was after 1 am.  Now, I do realize that Facebook is pretty much just the new version of the online time sink that I discovered back in the mid 90's when I was introduced to mIRC and the ilk.  So - I've been obsessed with "chatting" online for ages but I've just decided to blame it all on Facebook anyways because they are the new evil empire and trying to take over the world and I like G+ better but no one fucking uses it it seems.
:)



So, sticking with the new Evil Empire - while talking with an old (time wise, not age wise) friend last night I mentioned that I think it's weird that I have yet to start going through my mid-life crisis.  I don't expect it will be easy to double my current age and thus I fit the definition of someone who should be going through one.
Her retort is that maybe the new Job and new Store and new Outlook on life IS my mid-life crisis.
My response:
"Accepting a large raise and more responsibility is not a midlife crisis.... Buying a fancy penis mobile sports car and banging a ton of young broads is a midlife crisis.... Hookers and Coke and gambling binges and drinking binges that last days or weeks trying to keep up with the 20 somethings... that's a midlife crisis dammit...I'm so lame I even mess that shit up"

Don't need a caption to know what you're looking at

I've got two pics left for the post - Everyone is forewarned.  One is for the ladies and one is for the freaks who frequent my end of the world.   However that means that I need to come up with two more small paragraphs of information to type out.

While I have definitely slacked this month on my monthly goals I have started to look at my budget for the rest of the year and try to plan out November and December.  I'm also thinking ahead for next year and of course thinking about socking money away for vacations and retirement and all kinds of other stupid crap.  I'm not getting younger and I need that 401k to grow like a mofo so that I don't have to keep doing this until I'm 80.
It's almost time again to sign up for the Stock Purchase program at work and I'm debating between contributing enough for one stock every pay period or one per month.  I really need to sit down and look at all of the percentages and see what the end game result looks like once I start diversifying my eggs into their respective baskets.  Currently, while hammering off my debt, my baskets have been eggless which I realize is not recommended by most but I felt like it was the wiser decision at the time.  So, now that the debt has pretty much gone into a black hole of non-existence it's time to start increasing my contributions and making up for lost time.  It's just a matter of how and to what extent.

The stars might be aligning and I'll be meeting one of my newer friends in a couple of weeks.  Steelers fan and all around smart chick, stopping into Vegas for a few days on her way to some new fancy city with a new fancy job but doing the sensible thing and stopping by Vegas to visit family and friends.  Thus starts what I am dubbing "Visit Serge Season 2012" because if things work out I'll have somewhere between 2 and 4 rounds of visitors before the end of the year.  I'm guaranteed one, hoping for the rest of everyone's plans to pan out as well.  I'd love nothing more than to be able to share degenerate stories about friends vacations to my lovely city for the world to read (and of course keep them anonymous so that no one has to fear embarrassment!)
Hope y'all have a great Tuesday. I'm going to go and try to be productive before heading into work tonight.  I've got a lot planned for Weds and Thurs so I might not see ya again until Friday.

Being Nice has it's Disadvantages

So, over the last few days I have kinda discussed this "issue" with some friends and I have also brought it up to a small group of people who I now work with at my new store.

Let me start over.

I'm an asshole.  I'm full of sarcasm, bad humor and I come across as an asshole to a lot of people because of it.  I'm cool with it and in fact I spend many years crafting, honing and fine tuning my attitude and personality to get to the point where I am today.

I am able to simultaneously keep away the majority of people surrounding me while at the same time keeping a few friends who take the time to get to know me and realize exactly what I am and how to take my personality.

I don't like a whole lot of people.  I don't like people clamoring for my attention.  I don't want people planning social dates and inviting me to all kinds of place.  I just want my small group of friends that I can do shit with and screw the rest of the world.

However, now that I'm moving back up into a management level of the company I decided that with going to a new store where only a few people know me I should start with a new outlook on everything and a new perspective.  So, I have (so far) ditched most of the sarcasm and the off hand comments and have focused on just being nice to people in general.

I've started to notice the disadvantages to this type of behavior.

People, a lot of people, are being really nice to me.
Friendly even.
People are saying hi to me all the time.
People are starting random conversations with me.
People are talking to me about their day and their life.
People are trying to be friends with me.

Creepy.
I've had a couple people mention that "we could be good friends."
I don't know how to handle this type of positive attention.
I live, breathe and feed off negativity.

However, this is yet another "positive" change in my life that I am trying to make and I will find a way to cope with it all.

Bah, humbug

grrouch out

Unboxing, Unpacking and Woah - I still have that?

Being that I have nothing to do in the mornings for the next 5 days (working closing shifts) I have found a lot of free time on my hands to start actually opening up some boxes and trying to organize my life again into a room.

Today I found a whole box full of Hats that I had forgotten about.
I also found my old NES, Snes, N64 and Gamecube all in a box (with a Dreamcast, but lets stick with just the Nintendo Products).

4 Generations worth of Nintendo Controllers :)  

I've got shelves of Video Games to organize, Shelves of Movies to organize and I need to find a stand to display my old Video Game Systems as well.  No use having all this stuff in boxes packed away in a closet somewhere.  If they aren't out on display for the world to make fun of me then I'm doing it wrong.

5 Pounds

The last two days when I happened to get on the scale before my morning shower I finally dipped below 255.  Today was 254.2 and inching closer to my current goal of 250 and 50+ pounds lost during the year.
You see, I have a friends wedding to attend on Saturday and then a reception to attend on Sunday.  My current goal is to hit 250 or lower by the time the wedding rolls around, which would put me at having to lose 4.2 pounds but for fucks sake I'm rounding up to 5 pounds.  I have a week to do it so we will see.

Tonight is football night, watching my Steelers (tied at the half) face the Bengals.  I'm about to dip into some brews and eat some unhealthy stuff which is going to make the goal a bit harder.  Then I have to close at work the next two nights which will hurt as well.  What I'm hoping to do is to hit the gym in the morning and work a bunch of cardio in so that I can add exercise to my routine and give myself a chance to drop 5 pounds (and of course keep it off - not just a temporary thing to say I did it).

I'm going to look like a sleek handsome SOB next weekend and I'm really looking forward to the open bar.
Maybe if I get lucky there will be a hot bridesmaid who drinks entirely too much and loses her good sensibilities .....


Back to the Steelers game :)

He caught me Bluffing

He'd been sitting at the table for about 40 minutes and had decided to become the table maniac by making large bets and pushes at various moments because no one wanted to call any of it.  Either no one else decided to pay attention to this detail or everyone was afraid to get stacked which played right into his hands.

I had been playing for about 4 hours and carefully built up a stack of about $450 while he had been playing for a lot less longer and built up about the same stack.  While not afraid to go toe to toe with the guy I can see the end of the session in sight and just don't want to tango without some primo holdings.

This is where the trouble occurs, I get dealt two disgustingly ugly red Kings.

Three limpers into the pot when I move the action to $15 which was a large raise for the table before he sat down but he likes the number and so who am I to argue with him right?  I could have just called and waited to see if he raised it up (raise or fold yo!) but I'm not going to wait for someone else to hopefully bring the action to me - that backfires way too often.

Gentleman likes his hand, he re-pops it to $45 (and this is where I forgot to mention he was in a blind).  Everyone else folds to me, I make it $125.  This is not his first re-raise pre-flop but this is the first time he's been played back at.  I'm good with taking $45 from him right here and being done with it but I'm letting him know that this hand could be played for stacks as well.

He calls without a whole lot of hesitation, his hand range really still not laid out and visible.  Not having seen many showdowns from him except some weird flopped two pair with Q5 after he had re-raised someone else pre and then proceeded to take that gentleman to stacking down.
I can't put a definite range on his hand, You can throw the big pairs in there and big connectors, you can probably even keep some garbage in there because he wants to continue to be the table bully.

The flop is not exactly pretty.  I could have Zero outs, I could need to hit quads, who knows.
What I did know is that I had already made up my mind that if he has Aces then golf clap to him, it's his lucky night and I hope he hits the strip club up afterwards.

Qs 4s 7s

That's a lot of black on the table when I'm holding two red Kings.
Bully insta pushes.
Does he have Queens?  Did he have Ax of spades? Did he have two spades.
I just think the guy is trying to bully me.  That's what it all feels like in my head.
If he is thinking he has to put me on a big pair.  No one has played back at him.
Aces or Queens I go down swinging, he probably just has the Ace of spades and I"m willing to dodge 12 outs.  It's not ideal but I do not have him pegged for a man who has me beat at this very moment.
Call me stupid, call me stubborn.  Whatever you want to call me - I insta called him.

I flip up my 2 red Kings
He's not happy, he's not showing, I must have made the right play.

The Turn is the Jack of Not Spades, he makes no movement, he is still staring at the board and waiting for his miracle.
The turn is the 9 of Not Spades and then his reaction changes a bit.
He double checks his cards and a huge smile drapes across his lips at what I'm considering to be his awesome 2 out 9 on the river for an unlikely set.

He flips his cards.
I see a red 8 come up.  I scan the board - there are no 8's out there.  No set is possible.
This is my hand fucker.  He couldn't have hit a flush either right?
I double check the board - there are still only 3 spades and he is showing one red card - Game Over.
I'll take my profit and go home.  I'll party like the son of a broke rock star, with Diet Mt Dew - the fine shit that I ain't used to buying.

The Dealer separates his two cards, the 2nd one was stuck under the first and not visible.
it's a 10 - also not a spade.  Also not even fucking black.

Sweet.
Uh...
wait.
What the fuck just happened.
My mind starts to slowly put things together as my cards are grabbed by the dealer and then tossed to the muck like Not A Winner - No Chicken Dinner.  Go home like you just had your first sexual encounter because you're leaving Sticky, Broke and Confused.

It was 100% pure bluff with the two ugliest cards to follow.
Fuck Poker.
Fuck Lucky People.
No hookers and blow for daddy tonight.

grrouch out

Reconnecting with Hallowoween

Growing up Halloween was pretty much the number one holiday for me.  I didn't much care for any of the others and to this day I still take that exact stance except I have let my love for Halloween waver over the last number of years as well.  However, this year I've been reconnecting with it mostly through the eyes of a child again.

The past couple of nights have been spent going places that are mainly designated for kids but I've been having a blast walking through them and getting to see the excitement of this holiday from a kids perspective again.  The other night it was The Pumpkin Patch (not sure on the name but it sounds right) where there were some games and some rides set up for the kids and even a petting zoo and a bungee jumping area.  There was nothing really spooky about this place but the decor was nice with pumpkins everywhere to guide it.  Overall a small place but it was a lot of fun for me to watch all the little ones enjoying themselves in the name of the holiday.

Last night it was the Springs Preserve which was a lot larger and involved a lot more walking but not any less  fun, in fact I enjoyed it a lot more myself because of the set up.  There was an entrance fee to get in but that allowed access to one set of carnival type games for the kids where they were a guaranteed winner and got a prize after each set of games, I believe there were 10 in all.  There was also a performance stage where I never actually saw a performance go off but they played some great music all night culminating in the Ghostbusters Theme, Thriller and The Monster Mash as we were leaving the park.
There was a Trick or Treating area for the kids which we were not aware of before entering but that made no difference as our tiny guest quickly lost care of the fact that he was not wearing his Halloween Costume and just enjoyed going station to station to get his candy.  He never paid attention to the fact that each station had a particular theme like I did though as he was too interested in the pending sugar rush.

Each Station did have a unique theme from the Ghost Grotto to the Witches Lake, it was quite a site.  There were also a couple of interactive area's like the Mad Scientists area where there were two mad scientists showing kids some interesting things like a fish bowl filled with goop (which they could take a sample home with them - filled with SPIDERS of course) and a smoke barrel that blew out smoke circles when you smacked it on the bottom.

Finally, and of course my favorite, was the Haunted House.  Nothing extreme or overtly fancy but set up with a few different thrills and chills leading up to the last one which was an animated giant squid that appeared to be trying to get at you.  I bid my time nicely walking through the entire thing waiting for this one moment and when I saw it, I seized it and grabbed the mother making a loud scary noise to get a rise out of all near and with me.  Definitely a perfect way to end the haunted house making sure that everyone got a scream.

This is the type of stuff that I stopped doing and I have not damned idea why.  I have no good excuse. I love this holiday and got away from it.  But that shit stops here.  There are a number of other attractions in Las Vegas during the season that I really want to see now, things I have skipped over the years and told myself I wanted to go to but blew off.
So, I've got at least 3 more stops on my Halloween Tour this year including the Fright Dome which has a Ramero "Dead" exhibit this year.  Then there is the Bonnie Screams thing (Bonnie Springs is an old west area for kids that involves a few plays, a petting zoo and a restaurant that we took the kid to earlier in the year and it was pretty fun.  Looking forward to seeing the UNDEAD version of it, muhahahah) and this year Eli Roth has decided to make his presence felt with Eli Roth's Goratorium located somewhere on the strip.  This is the one I'm really looking forward to as it will be much more adult-centric and I might end up having to go without company.  However, I expect it to be a blast and probably also very disgusting!

So there you have it, I've been abscent from the blog a bit lately but I've been getting in touch with my inner child.  I've bought a couple of small decorations for the house just for my benefit that includes fake blood on my patio door, some pumpkins and skulls to decorate a window or too and some pumpkin lights that I"m probably going to throw on the entrance door.  Work has a few more things that I"m just waiting to go on sale to grab up mainly for next year.
The Halloween stores that I've have gone to have gotten me a bit giddy as well when we were searching for Halloween costumes for the kid.  I loved the Spirit store mainly because they had a good number of really creepy looking zombie babies that I want - one was chewing its own foot off.  Oh delicious thing you were.

Next year I've already decided that I will be putting a budget aside to get some permanent Halloween decorations that I can put up every year around the house and outside the house to show off my life for the season.  Everyone else can have their Xmas, give me the blood and gore and decorations of this un-dead holiday and I"m going to be a happy camper.

In the same vein I've been watching Season 2 of The Walking Dead and I just bought 50+ horror movies in various packs (for under $20) to keep myself (and the old man) occupied through the season.

Long Live Halloween.
Long Live the Undead.
Long Live all that is gory, creepy, spooky and just downright rotten.

The Dreaded Retail Schedule

Over the past two years I really got spoiled by working a very consistent shift within the retail environment and I never realized to what degree until recently when I took my promotion.

That being said - I really hate retail work hours.  You get rid of the huge inconsistency and I would really love my job a whole lot more.  This is pretty much the one big downfall and companies pretty much do not care.
I'm sure I'm not the exception here so it's safe to say that people in general work better when they have a consistent shift. Whether that shift be 6-3, 10-7 or 2-11, if you work the same shift every single day that you work your body adapts and your get good sleeping patterns and as such you will be more awake and alert, you will be happier and more content, you will work better and probably harder and you will be a better employee.

But, when it comes to normal retail scheduling all bets are off because the companies pretty much don't give a rats ass about any of that.  They just want bodies to fill the schedule and it doesn't matter what shifts you like better or what shifts you worked the most recently.

So, now I'm back to working weeks where I have to be to work by 5:30 am, 10 am and 1:30 pm all in the same week in any random chaotic order.
The good news is that they are trusting me with the scheduling so I'm going to do my best to make things a whole hell of a lot better than they ever are under the regular system.

I already started talking to a couple of my employees and running ideas by them and it's all been positive for the most part.  They actually like the idea of a Manager who is willing to listen to their thoughts and then try to implement them.  I'm sure they are just giving me the benefit of the doubt while doubting me in their heads until they see some real proof that things will change, but I'm an agent of positive change.  It will take a cycle or two to get everything into effect but the end result will be a schedule that is more positive, or at least more towards their liking.

Unfortunately the first thing I have to do is actually make it through the first cycle of schedules (4 week rotations) so that I can make a list of everyone's days off and see what the schedule is actually spitting out for people.  In the meantime it's just talking to everyone and finding out work and shift preferences.  The thing I have working against me at the moment is that I have no one in my area that actually likes/prefers to close.  Everyone has told me they would prefer opening and mid to closing.  Oh well - there goes the easy solution!

I've already started a spreadsheet in Google Docs of the 1st two weeks that I have gotten to work on and I'll be plugging in the next two weeks as well.  My whole goal is to give them an actual 4 week rotation where (with the exception of requests off) they will be able to know their exact schedule for every week that they work before it ever gets posted.  This way they can make plans even for days that they work instead of just for their two days off.  I'm sure I'll need a little luck for this to work as well as I want it to, but I've got a lot of patience.


My other retail news is that starting in 2 weeks I will have a part time person for my 2nd department.  This will now give me 3 people for each of my two areas which will allow me to spend less time actually covering the departments and give me more time to get my work done.  These first couple of weeks I have had to find time to get my work done while being the only person in one (or sometimes both) of my area's and helping customers with product that I don't quite understand yet.  However, knowledge takes time and I'm making progress every day.
Yesterday I had a customer who brought this really ugly contraption that was connected to a well that was built back in 1979 or something and he wanted to re-create the contraption with new parts and preferably without any threads on any of the pipes if possible.  2 weeks ago I would have paged for someone else to come save me while I watched and tried to get the idea of it but yesterday I spent 30-40 minutes with the customer going through the product and piecing everything together so that he could go home and recreate it.
It was a pain in the ass and a bit overwhelming at first but the end result is that he got everything he needed and I felt good about helping him even if I didn't fully understand everything that I was getting for him.

I originally came in here just to bitch about the fact that today and tomorrow are both 10-7 shifts for me which is the longest and most boring shift that I get (well, it feels like it anyway).  Right in the middle of the day and really biting into my ability to do whatever it is that I want to do.  It especially sucks that this week it happens to fall on a Weds/Thurs which are the two days I'd rather have off or work early shifts for various reasons.  However, I had no hand in this schedule and as such I just have to play the hand that is dealt to me.

So, now to end with something completely random.